Most annoying things to say to a new mom

Who does he/she look like?  
My baby was just born. Please let me enjoy her for a moment before you start picking apart every physical aspect of her trying to determine exactly where each part came from. My baby is beautiful and unique regardless. She may have characteristics that are similar to us or her siblings but she is her own person. It's not like she isn't going to look completely different in one month and as the years go on.

Are you getting enough sleep? Is he/she sleeping through the night yet?
Again, my child was just born so no I'm not getting "enough" sleep.  *grits teeth* No, not sleeping through the night yet. Have you ever had a baby?! They eat every 3-4 hours if not more leaving it impossible to sleep through the night, especially when breastfeeding.

If there is anything you need let me know. Do you need anything for the baby?
Instead of saying this offer what you are willing to do for the new mom. No one is going to say, "Yes, I would like you to come watch my older kids so I can nap with the baby." Or "Please, come over and cook for me." It's so nice when someone says offers certain things that they want to do for you. I'm the last person to ask for help so unless someone comes right out and says, "Hey! I'm bringing over dinner so you don't have to cook." I won't ask for it. So be a great friend and tell the new mom what you are willing to do for them. They will appreciate it more than you know.

Are you going to have another one?
Probably not the best thing to ask when a mom isn't getting sleep. I don't understand why so many people ask this question immediately after labor and delivery. Almost like saying, "this ones out on to the next!" At least for me the answer is almost always no. That is until my baby is sleeping through the night and I get baby fever.

Your baby is TINY/HUGE!
It's the equivalent to calling me fat or skinny. Maybe it's just my hormones but I find it rude.

Is he/she a good baby?
Is it possible to have a "bad" baby? Do you honestly think that crying all of the time makes a baby naughty or bad? Are "bad babies" the ones who, the moment they are born, make a conscious decision to make their parents lives miserable? I don't think so.

Did you want a boy/girl?
It's a little late. Pretty sure I didn't have a choice either way.

Why This Momma Likes Twitter

I created a twitter account 4 years ago. It was to get points on some survey of some sort, I don't really remember and never took it very seriously. My account was never used and it just sat there. Then one day a couple months ago I got my first Iphone, (I know, it took me awhile). One of the free apps was twitter so I downloaded it. Only a small handful of people that I know in real life have a twitter account. That left me with no one to really "follow" besides celebrities.

I have 235 friends on facebook all of whom I know personally or they are distant cousins of my husbands. All of my posts are updates on our family, pictures of our daily adventures and sometimes the occasional article that I find interesting. I learned early to watch carefully what I post because it is seen by family/friends. An innocent rant can start discussions with people I don't feel like discussing with or drama with those who I'd rather not argue with. So I've kept to the basics. I cannot tell you how many times I've written out a facebook status only to delete it because it contained too much. Which is why I've found that twitter is perfect for me. 

After exploring twitter for a few days I discovered that there are moms just like me on it. Everyday moms. Moms who tweet about the struggles of parenting, the humor in raising children, their happy moments, simple rants about life and more. I've seen it used as an outlet for some, a platform almost. It gives these everyday moms like myself a voice and introduces us to other moms who we may have never had "met" otherwise. It's pretty cool. 

I love that I can post things about breastfeeding, co-sleeping, potty problems, kid issues or whatever. I even told the twitter world that I was in labor before anyone else and tweeted my way to the hospital. I've found support on twitter that I just can't find with facebook friends. Sometimes a simple notification that someone "favorited" my tweet shows me that someone out there gets what I'm going through. 

 There are twitter moms that I find hilarious, brilliant, entertaining and insightful. (and dads too, don't forget the twitter dads!) It's a place where you could spend hours scrolling through tweets everyday. Personally, it's my entertainment when I'm up breastfeeding in the middle of the night and need some light reading. Will I stay on twitter forever? Probably not, but for now I'm enjoying having somewhere to share things that I wouldn't share on my facebook. :)

Are you on twitter? Here's the link to mine: Freestyle Mom

What to do for a friend who has just had a baby

I'm writing this after having three kids. These are the things that people did for our family that helped tremendously. Things that were priceless and more helpful that any gift of money, baby clothes or keepsakes. I highly recommend these things in place of or along side of baby gifts. Simply saying, "If you need anything let me know" to a new mom doesn't really do much. Personally I'm always too proud to ask for help or for little things. Here are just a few ideas of nice things to do for someone who has just had a baby.

1) Bring a meal for the family. Ask the family if they mind if you bring over a meal. Drop it off or bring it when you come for a visit. Whether it's a pizza, frozen lasagna, something homemade...whatever. I cannot tell you how helpful and grateful we are for those friends and family members who brought us food or came and cooked for our family the first couple weeks home. Even if you stop by on the way over to visit and pick up healthy snacks for a breast feeding mom. Or stop at the grocery store and pick up things that they like/need.

2)A gift basket with:

• baby tylenol
• gripe water
• baby orajel
• diapers (in size 1 or bigger, babies grow fast)
• baby wipes (unscented)
• breast pads (if mother is breastfeeding)
• baby soap
• baby lotion
• burp rags 
• healthy granola bars
• gift cards
• baby bottle cleaning wand

These are some of the things that I found useful or needed and forgot.

3) If the family has other children:

• If you are close with the family and they have other children offer to take them out for the day or overnight. Or even just swing by and take them to the park for an hour. Recently a friend took my oldest daughter out for a couple hours during the day while my son was at school. It was AMAZING and so helpful. I was able to get so much done and it was a nice break. 
• When you go over to visit the new baby bring something special for the older siblings. Whether it's a puzzle, coloring book, special snack or a fun game. We've had people visit who brought simple little things and then sat with our older two kids to play. My husband and I were so exhausted that week and felt like we had been neglecting our older two kids a little bit. Having visitors pay attention to and play with them was so nice. 

Life with 3 kids, the first three weeks home....

We brought our littlest addition home 3 weeks ago. Our family is now 5 members strong. (plus our dog Dakota) I'm not going to lie and I'm going to tell it like it is. The last three weeks have been the hardest and most stressful of my entire adult life.

They let us come home from the hospital after just about 24 hours. I was excited to be able to get some sleep without having nurses coming in every few hours. My uterine contractions were pretty intense and painful so I was given some pain medication to take home. The nurses told me that uterine contraction pain can get worse with each pregnancy. Luckily, my parents stayed at our house for a few days to help out with our 4 and 2 year old. That was so helpful and gave me plenty of time to sleep. It was a great first weekend home. We had some visitors and so much extra help. Friends of ours even brought dinner over one night so no one had to cook, that was one of the greatest gifts we could ever receive. (I highly recommend doing that for a friend/family member) Our new baby only woke twice every night to eat. It was wonderful.
Reality hit me hard when my parents went home and my husband went back to work. I was left on my own to discover being a stay at home mom to 3 kids. It wasn't so much the baby that was difficult to get used to. It was everything. It was getting my older kids to understand that when the baby cries mommy has to tend to the baby. When mommy is breastfeeding she can't jump up to get them more milk or open the cabinets for a snack immediately when asked. The older kids reacted by crying and whining. A lot. Maybe they thought that if they were like baby that daddy and mommy would rush to meet their needs as well. It started to become utter and pure chaos in our home. I was exhausted, my husband was exhausted and our oldest two kids were feeling neglected. Everyone was emotional. There was a lot of yelling and crying. It was such a blessing when we'd have visitors because they would cook for us and give our older kids attention. I was far too worn out to play with them, so it was great.

About a week after we came home from the hospital my husband's job stopped having work for him. He has been working and training as an HVAC installer for the past year. Secretly, I was excited that he would be home with me to help with the kids. There was also that fear of, "How are we going to pay our bills? Our mortgage is due soon, how are we going to pay it?" After 2 weeks passed with no work we made the decision for him to look for work in the same field elsewhere. It was scary because he'd only been at the job for a year and we weren't sure if that was enough time or experience to get offered another job. Still, we had to try. So he sat down and wrote a resume. Then I looked over and proof read it. The next day he went out and applied at a few different HVAC shops. Almost immediately he started getting call backs. It was amazing. He went for his first interview the next day and was offered a position on the spot. The new job started today, so I'm back to wrangling the kids by myself. We are just thankful that the job hunt only lasted a day and not weeks.

Our older two kids love and adore their baby sister. They love laying down on the floor watching her, holding her and talking to her. I don't think our problem is jealousy because they don't seem to be mad at the baby. They seem to be mad at my husband and I when we can't tend to their needs immediately. I think that even with my husband home full-time it was frustrating. I felt like getting ready to leave the house everyone was running around in circles trying to figure out their place. Newborns need so much stuff it's insane. As a family we just need to figure out a routine that works for us, and that is going to take time. I'm hoping that it gets a little easier everyday. 

My Birth Story

It was 2 days until my due date. I woke up, looked at my phone and saw that my mom had tried calling me three times. That wasn't normal for her. Usually she calls once and waits for me to call her back. Immediately I knew that something was wrong. I called her back, bracing myself for bad news. As soon as I heard her voice I knew. My grandma had passed away in the early morning hours. We were half expecting it, but it was still devastating. I thanked my mom for telling me, told her that I loved her and hung up the phone. Still laying down in bed, with my kids waking up beside me I burst into tears. Memories of my grandma from my childhood ran through my head and I sobbed almost uncontrollably for a few minutes. My son asked me what was wrong and I explained to him that his great grandma was now in heaven and that mommy was a little sad. He ran to the bathroom and grabbed me some toilet paper to dry my tears. Both of my kids came in for a cuddle.
Throughout the day I had my moments where I broke down in tears. My grandma lived a happy, full life but it was still hard knowing that she was gone. I had talked to her on the phone a few weeks before and she had sounded so worn out, so tired. I had told her that I was praying for her and that I loved her. After we hung up I wrote her a letter, again telling her that I loved her and adding a picture of my oldest in his t-ball uniform.
My husband came home later that day and after we put the kids to bed I went into the shower, turned in on and sank to the floor crying again. When I came out my husband was there and we talked and cuddled until midnight. As we were talking I was having mini painless contractions. I kept telling him that I didn't want to go to sleep because I had a feeling that it was going to happen, that I was going to have the baby. He was exhausted so he went to bed. I tried to sleep but I kept tossing and turning because the baby was pushing down hard on my cervix and it hurt. It felt like she was trying to claw her way out.
Then at 1:51 am (sept 19 2014) I both heard and felt a pop in my lower abdomen. I immediately jumped up and rushed the the bathroom. I took off my shorts/underwear and began leaking all over the floor. I quickly texted my neighbor friend that I thought that my water had broken. Luckily she woke up when I texted. Then I attempted to wake up my husband, I don't think that he truly believed me. Finally, he woke up and got the kids in the car to take down the street to the neighbors. It was 2:25am when we dropped the kids off. I had my first painful contraction in the neighbors driveway. I yelled for my husband to hurry up. The hospital was a 10 minute drive away. I had 3 more contractions on the way to the hospital. In between contractions I called to let them know we were coming. I ended up having to hand the phone to my husband so he could tell them. I was in too much pain to talk.
My husband dropped me off at the door and quickly parked the car. I hobbled inside. When someone noticed me I mustered out, "I need help, I'm having a baby." A nurse rushed over with a wheelchair and just as I was about to sit down another contraction came on. I couldn't sit and had to wait until it passed. My husband ran in at that moment. I was able to sit in the wheelchair and my husband started pushing it towards the elevator to the labor and delivery floor. I had another contraction in the elevator.
Once we got to the labor and delivery floor we had to press a button to be buzzed inside. The doors opened and the nurse calmly asked my husband to wheel me to the front desk. As she started asking me a series of questions I had yet another contraction. I yelled out, "I'm sorry but this baby is coming, I can't concentrate on your questions. I think I have to poop!" After that contraction ended I was wheeled into a room, handed a gown and directed to the bathroom to put it on. I had another contraction while in the bathroom and I didn't want to come out. As I was walking to the bed another contraction came on. I told the nurse that I couldn't lay down, that I needed to be up. She explained that she needed to check to see how dilated I was. I somehow managed to lay down so that she could check me. I was dilated to a 7. I begged for pain medicine.
The nurse left the room to get another nurse and some pain medicine. When she came back I was having another contraction. The other nurse was in the corner of the room doing something, I don't know what. The first nurse struggled to put an IV in me because I was wriggling around the bed trying to work through a contraction. She got the IV in, pushed the pain med in and walked over to the other nurse. That's when I yelled out. "THE BABY IS COMING, I NEED TO PUSH, I NEED TO PUSH!" The nurses yelled back not to push, that I wasn't ready. I reached down and felt the head and tried to gently push the baby back in. I was scared. My husband yelled, "I SEE THE HEAD!!"
Both nurses, shocked, rushed over just in time to catch the baby. My beautiful baby girl was born at 2:58am on September 19th. The doctor arrived about 20 minutes later, just in time to deliver the placenta.
My labor/delivery from start to finish was roughly one hour. I am beyond blessed because God knows  I don't tolerate pain very well. My baby girl weighed 7 pounds 4 ounces and was 20.5 inches long. I had no tearing/ripping.
We are so blessed to have a healthy little girl to add to our family.

4 days until my due date

There are only 4 days left until my due date. I was fine waiting for the baby's arrival until yesterday. With plenty of school work to do I wasn't trying to rush labor. Yesterday changed my mind completely.
Yesterday, all of a sudden I started having horribly painful contractions. For about an hour I locked myself in the bathroom wondering if I was in labor or getting sick. Rocking back and forth in pain I tried to stay calm. My oldest was at preschool and my youngest was in the hallway playing with our dog. The pain was so intense that I threw up. Quickly I texted my neighbor friend to please pick my son up from school because I was in a lot of pain and knew I wouldn't be able to drive. Then I ran to unlock the front door so that she could get in. The pain intensified and I jumped in the bathtub to run warm water over my stomach, anything for a little bit of relief. Soon my friend came in, got my kids in the car and rushed us all to the hospital. On the drive there we got caught behind a slow moving semi truck, which spiked my anxiety. She stopped at the front of the emergency room so that I could hop out while she parked the car with the kids. I hobbled uncomfortably inside. As soon as the ladies at the desk saw my face they jumped up. I mustered out, "I think I'm having a baby."
I was taken immediately to Labor and Delivery, changed into a gown and hooked up to monitors to watch my contractions and the baby's heartbeat. When they checked for dilation I was only at 1 cm. A little while later the pain was better so they allowed me to walk the halls. My parents came to help with the kids and a couple hours in they checked me again. I was disappointed to learn that I was still at 1 cm. My contractions were still coming, 3 about every 15 minutes so they allowed me to stay another 2 hours to see if my body was progressing. Unfortunately the final time the nurse checked for dilation I was still at only 1 cm. Still in pain and still contracting they sent me home but gave me a mild muscle relaxer to help me sleep through the night.
The medicine helped a little, but regardless I was awoken about every 30 minutes with pain. This morning I woke up in pain so I ran a warm bath. Throughout the day I was still contracting. I tried to nap, got some homework done and made some burritos to store in the freezer for after baby comes. I'm about to go to sleep now and the contractions are painless. I'm not going to lie. I'm frustrated and scared. Frustrated because I had all that pain and didn't dilate and scared for it all to happen again.
I guess I just have to keep my eye on the prize, my baby girl, and get some sleep. I never know what tomorrow brings, maybe tomorrow will be her birthday!

39 weeks and 1 day

Today has been the most confusing, painful, emotional day of this pregnancy so far. I spent over an hour in the bathroom having painful contractions, thinking that this was it, that I was going into labor. I quickly texted my neighbor asking that if it was time could she take the kids. I told the kids to pack overnight bags and my husband packed his bags. Then all my pain went away leaving me confused, exhausted and emotional. I fell asleep for a few hours, woke up to more pain that went away as well.
So now I'm sitting here writing this, while working on homework, waiting. This is going to be the longest week of my life.

9 Days Until My Due Date

There are only 9 days left until my due date and I'm freaking out a little bit. Both my kids were born a week early, which means that labor could happen at anytime. Every little pain makes me think, "Is this it?!". The last week has been full of sleepless nights and semi painful contractions. Every time I think I'm going to fall asleep I feel an almost electric shock jolt through my groin and legs. 

I'm about a week ahead on all my school work so I'm not too worried about that. Everyday I try to get a little more ahead on my reading and assignments. I don't want to have to do too much related to school while in the hospital. A few days ago my husband packed pretty much everything I'll need at the hospital into the car. I still have to wrap the "Big Sister" gift we got for our daughter, paint my toenails pink and do some laundry. Then we will be ready, or as ready as we will ever be. I keep finding things to add to my to do list. I cannot believe how fast this pregnancy has gone. Before I know it I'll be holding my little baby. :)

Talking to My 4 Year Old About Skin Color and Weight

A few months ago we took the kids to the park. There was a man there with a rather large belly. Before this day I would have thought nothing of it. However, our 4 year old decided to loudly point out, "Look Mom! That guy is fat!" Mortified, and almost positive the man heard my son I tried to calmly walk over to the other side of the park to have a quiet discussion. I asked my son to be quiet for a moment and follow me, to which he replied in the same loud voice, "But mom, he is fat! He's just fat. He has a really big belly." The man ended up leaving, and I felt horrible. My son wasn't trying to be vicious or mean, he was simply making an observation out loud. I sat down with him and let him know that yes the man did have a big belly but that sometimes we need to keep comments like that to ourselves. "Why?" he asked.  I went on to explain that saying things like that could hurt someone's feelings if they heard him. Going even further we talked about how everyone is different and that's ok. Some people have big bellies, some people have small bellies, some people are super tall and others are short. I told him that just because someone looks or sounds different doesn't mean that they aren't nice people.
Over the following months he has made similar observatory comments about people who look different then himself. "Mommy, that boy has black hair like Daddy." "I met a new friend. He was different, his skin was a different color. His skin was black." Instead of saying anything I decided to let him tell me more about what he was thinking and discovered that his comments and observations are just part of his development as a child. The differences didn't bother him, he was just letting me know. My job is to listen and make sure that he understands that we are all different and that's ok. He's simply coming to a point in his childhood where he is noticing differences, patterns and similarities. Instead of getting upset and shocked I realized I need to acknowledge what he is telling me and talk him through his discoveries so that differences like skin color and weight don't bother him. If I choose to make a big deal over everything he says then it could potientally become a problem in the future. As parents we need to be careful of how we talk about other peoples differences as well. Our children look up to us and our comments about others shape how their train of thoughts about others will be. If we speak negitively about others on a regular basis in front of our children, so will they.

Being A Stay At Home Mom & College Student

Being a stay at home mom is not for everyone. Having worked full-time previously and now experiencing being at home all the time, I am struggling with balancing adult and child time. A few years ago when I worked full-time outside of the home I had plenty of adult interaction in the workplace.  Now seeing as I am a stay at home mom there is no daily reason for me to leave the house to socialize with other adults. Socializing takes an extra effort now, and quite honestly sometimes I'm just too worn out. 

Being slightly introverted means that I have to be careful not to completely isolate myself from the real world because to be honest it doesn't bother me to not leave the house everyday. Social media and texting keep me connected to friends and family on a daily basis. Sometimes that's enough for me. 
Add college courses, pregnancy, puppy and you have one stressed out momma at times.  My days consist of taking care of the needs of a 4 year old boy, 2.5 year old girl, 8 month old puppy, my husband and myself. I'm not going to lie, everyday isn't easy. Juggling it all lately has been difficult because I'm exhausted and in pain from pregnancy. 

When my college courses are in full swing I spend my mornings parked at the dining room table surrounded by my laptop and textbooks. I make the kids breakfast and let them watch cartoons while I read my textbooks. Then throughout the day I trade off between playing with the kids, reading/studying, cooking meals, cleaning up after meals, laundry, running errands, dropping off/picking up 4 year old from school, doctor appointments, sports, playing with dog, more homework, getting snacks/drinks, breaking up fights and more. 

My goal is to be the best mom I can be to my kids and to get great grades in all my college courses. Once I'm finished with my bachelors degree in a couple years I'll rejoin the workforce. By then my oldest two will be in school all day and only one will need daycare. Sometimes I really miss going to work 5 days a week and being around adults all day. Then I remember how much I missed my son while I was at work and how now I'm doing what is best for family and myself. Raising my children and furthering my education is what is important right now. As stressful as it can be I honestly couldn't imagine my life any different right now. In 50 years I will be able to look back and remember all the moments that I got to witness first hand with my kids. Those future memories I wouldn't trade for the best career in the world. 

Although this pic describes me perfectly when I do get the opportunity to leave the house kid-free: 

Co-Sleeping: Our Family Bed

Co-sleeping is one of the most controversial topics that I've come across in my almost 5 years of being a mom. It's a subject that sometimes I don't even want to bring up around certain groups of people because I don't feel like I should have to defend myself. When we tell the majority of people that our kids share our bed we often get negative reactions. I've been told that I need to get them to sleep in their own beds and that they are never going to leave our bed. The most heard phrase has been, "You'll be sorry!".  Immediately after learning that we bed share people assume that we want advice on how to stop or on how to get our kids out of the family bed and into their own beds. I don't think it even crosses their minds that it is ok with us. Or that we don't mind it. It's just one of those subjects that, in my opinion, is to each their own. It works for some families and doesn't for others. It just so happens to work for our family.

Our co-sleeping journey started almost immediately after our son was born. When we brought him home from the hospital he was put into a bassinet in a separate room to sleep at night. Only he didn't sleep. He would fall asleep in my arms after feedings only to wake up minutes after I lay him down. I was given advice to let him cry it out and told that I would only be spoiling him by picking him up and that he needed to be trained to sleep on his own. Which to me was absurd. How could I not respond to my newborn's cries? It took a few sleepless nights for me to realize that all he wanted was his momma, he needed me. It was like a wake up call. After spending 9 months carrying him inside of me and then being put in a room to sleep two days later where he couldn't see/feel/touch/smell me had to be terrifying for him. My mommy instincts kicked in and I trusted them wholeheartedly. We both weren't getting any sleep so I did what I thought was best....I moved into the room with him at night and guess what? Everyone got sleep. It was wonderful. Some nights he slept in his bassinet with my hand draped in and other nights I brought him in bed with me, while my husband slept peacefully in our room. As our son got older he would often times sleep in his crib in his own room for days at a time with no problem. Then before his first birthday he started having night terrors and we moved him in a pack n play next to our bed. Over the last four and a half years we let him determine on his own how comfortable he was sleeping alone. If he felt comfortable sleeping in a different room then we let him. We never turned him away when he came crawling into our bed halfway through the night.

When our 2nd child was born I didn't even attempt to separate her from myself at night. She was breastfed so we shared a bed, just the two of us, until she was bigger and slept through the night. At around 9 months she slept in her own room for a while, but we continued breast feeding until she was a little over 2 years of age. Now at just about 3 year old she is sleeping in our bed full-time.

I honestly wouldn't have it any other way right now. Most nights I end up sleeping at the end of our king sized bed with the kids sprawled out wherever they fall asleep. Whenever they have a bad dream or wake up scared they find either me or my husband to cuddle with and fall right back to sleep. Sometimes all it takes is for them to reach over and touch one of us to feel safe again. Some nights I wake up with a kick in the face or with both my kids fighting over who gets to share mommy's pillow.  Regardless, I wouldn't change our sleeping situation for anything. I feel so blessed to have that extra cuddle time with them every night and morning. There's just something special about being over to reach over in the middle of the night and feel that both my kids are sleeping and safe.

As for having clingy, dependent children (like the myth of co-sleeping talks about)....I feel like I have the opposite. Both my kids are relatively shy with people they don't know well, but so are my husband and myself. Once they know and trust someone their personalities shine through. They are both very independent and adventurous children. During the day my kids go off and play independently for pretty much the entire day. The only time they come to us is when they need help with something, want us to play a game with them, want to show us something they figured out, are hungry/thirsty, have to tell us a story about something that just happened, or if they are tired and want to lay down. I've been blessed with children who are very good at entertaining themselves, and never once have I heard them say that they are bored. Our oldest had no problem going off to preschool. There was no separation anxiety what so ever. In fact the first day I dropped him off he told me to leave. Our daughter had a little bit of a problem being dropped off at Sunday School, but after she realized that we always came back for her she ran to be dropped off.

Co-sleeping obviously isn't for everyone, but it works for us. It has built a trust between our children and ourselves. They know that they can come to us with whatever is bothering them and we will respond to them no matter what time of day/night. That trust is something that I hope will continue and grow even after they leave our room.

Thinking about Co-sleeping? Don't take my word for it. One of my favorite articles on co-sleeping by Dr. Sears: http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/health-concerns/sleep-problems/co-sleeping-yes-no-sometimes

Love Letters to Your Kids

A couple years ago I bought a simple notebook and started writing little love notes to my kids. Every once in a while I'll  pick it up and write a couple pages about things they are learning, how old they are, what they mean to me and silly things that they have been doing. Sometimes I go months or a year without writing to them because life gets so hectic, but my goal is to fill it up before they all reach 18 years old. It's just something that takes a few minutes here and there that I can leave my kids in the future. If something ever happens to me I want there to be something left behind with in my handwriting. Something they can physically hold. Something they can read that will tell them just how much they mean to me. 

Nearing the End of Pregnancy

I'm getting to the end of my pregnancy and sleep is rare, which isn't fun because once the baby comes I know full well that my sleep situation won't be getting much better. I'll be up every 2-3 hours for weeks breastfeeding a newborn, taking care of my other kids, studying, writing papers and attempting to stay sane. It's going to be an interesting adventure, that's for sure. For the next couple weeks I'm trying to enjoy my son and daughter as much as possible.
I didn't take summer college classes this year so that we could do as many fun activities as possible before the new addition arrived and my oldest started Pre-K. We went on nature walks, hikes through the woods, swimming, had fun at the splash park, spent TONS of time at the library and reading books. I tried to get them out of the house as much as possible. Our family went to a couple weddings and spent time with family and friends as much as we could. Once the baby is born and winter hits I am sensing a semi lock down at our house until we all get the hang of things.

I feel like these last weeks are going to drag on with anticipation of our new arrival. Everyday the aches and pains of the third trimester intensify. Luckily I am finding some relief with weekly visits to the chiropractor, however I haven't been able to find a remedy for the electric shock like pains that randomly shoot down my legs periodically throughout the day. I swear I look like a crazy person when I get them in public. I trip and scream out in pain....which causes people to whip their heads around and stare at me. Oh, the joys of pregnancy! :)

Family Fun Night (at home)

Family Fun Night is something we started with the kids about a year ago. We try to have one about once a month. It's all about spending time at home with the family. We order pizza, pick up the kids favorite junk food snacks and choose a movie to watch. After we eat dinner it's time for a fun family friendly movie. We lay a big blanket down on the floor, put out all the pillows we can find, bring out our blankets and snuggle as we watch the movie. Of course we eat tons of popcorn and gummy worms! 

Our kids favorite parts are "pizza from the pizza man", gummy worms and having both of us watch a movie with them. 

I can't wait until they are old enough to play board games!! 

Here is a picture from our very first "Family Fun Night".

Out of the mouths of babes

Jackson was sitting in the dirt playing before we were about to leave the house. My husband asked him not to get his pants dirty. His response: "Dad, it's ok! These are my work pants." :) 

The Pressures of Potty Training a Little Girl

"You need to potty train that girl already!" "Oh, I think she's ready to be potty trained!" "She can talk, she doesn't need diapers."

Those were the comments I was getting shortly after my daughter turned two years old. I received endless advice and heard countless success stories. As if being in diapers at two was the worst possible situation for a little girl. Then almost as soon as I announced that I was pregnant with my third child the floodgates opened. Countless people were telling me that I had better hurry up and get that girl out of diapers before the new baby arrives. One of the statements I heard the most was, "Girls are so much easier to potty train." I was told stories of mothers potty training their little girls by 18 months of age and how simple it was to do. Basically, I was made to feel like my daughter was behind others her age and I had to catch her up to some invisible deadline.
At first I felt the pressure of wanting to please others and the yearning to have that accomplishment out of the way. I tried. I did. For a solid week I took away diapers. I bribed my 2 year old with Hershey chocolate kisses for using the toilet. I set timers and rushed her to the bathroom every 20-30 minutes after she drank something. I bought her "big girl" under ware. I sang and did a happy dance every time she made it to the toilet. She had ME trained to take her to the bathroom and it was exhausting.
However, after a few days the novelty wore off for her and for myself. Potty time became fight time. She didn't want to do it. I'd catch her hiding behind chairs or in the corner using the carpet as a restroom. I cleaned more messes then I care to remember. My carpet and my patience were suffering. It was frustrating. We were both frustrated, but I didn't want to give up, and I didn't want to fail. By the end of the week she was begging me to let her wear diapers again. She was adamant about wearing them. As a matter of fact, she started putting diapers on herself and changing them after they were soiled. We were both tired and it was obvious that SHE wasn't ready. So I stopped fighting and trying to bribe her to do something she evidently did not want to do. We let it go and I ignored the commentary and advice that I continued to receive.
Fast forward about 6 months. One day out of the blue my daughter looked at me and said, "No more diapers. I'm a big girl now." She took off her diaper, went to her dresser, pulled out the under ware that I had purchased for her months earlier, and put them on. Ever since that day she has been using the toilet. Some days I have to remind her to stop what she is doing and go, and there have been a few accidents every once in a while. Sometimes we've had to pick her up and rush her to the bathroom as quickly as possible. There have been times when we have been out shopping and she waits until we are on the farthest end of the store from the restroom to announce, "Mommy! I have to go potty!"
It's been an adventure for sure, but since that day when she decided she was done with diapers there has been no going back, only moving forward.
To be perfectly honest, dealing with diapers isn't the worst thing in the world. Every child is different and does things at their own speed and with their own style. I learned that my daughter is extremely independent and intelligent. She wants to do everything herself on her own timeline. Sometimes this can be challenging, but in the case of potty training I needed to allow her to do her own thing and not force her into something she wasn't fully comfortable with. She takes pride in her accomplishments, and you can see the satisfaction on her face. Letting her take the lead has given her confidence, which is a quality that I want all my children to possess. Being a mom is a journey and I've learned that there are going to be people pressuring me to do things a certain way or raise my children their way. Ultimately I need to do what is best and what works for MY family and remember that just because something might work for someone else's family doesn't mean that it will work for mine.